Its Started

Whats started.  Not something important to others but to me its a major step forward.  It means mentally I have changed position yet again. That is really important in my longer term recovery and understanding of my own illness.

So whats started.  I can listen to new music again.  Doesn't sound like much but it is.  Until recently new music made me tense and paranoid.  Then after all the stress of the last week changed me.  Now I crave new sounds new music.  It also has another meaning one that is extremely important to me, it means that I can now enjoy my gaming without having to give it up after 40 minutes.

I am becoming the old me, the me that was ok that enjoyed to explore the world around him.  If I gain one more thing back, I will have recovered the parts of me that I wanted back.  That were taken away by the illness and medications.  I just need to be able to write short stories again.  I miss that creative outlet for my thoughts and dreams.

Please do not get me wrong reader, I enjoy my blogging but there is nothing like creating worlds and characters, to take a reader on a merry path. To leave them guessing or to make them smile.  I like the role of an author, to deceive the reader to make them for a short time believe that what you are saying is real even if its not.

I will never be a great writer, I probably will never ever get published but that doesn't take away from the joy of the act its self.  I hope its not much longer till the words begin to flow, to form in my head to become real.

Thanks for reading