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Showing posts from October, 2012

The Little B**ch

Well that's unlike me no?  Well this little black duck has had enough of our female housemate.  She is an open out and out B**ch.  She is passive aggressive and says one thing means another.  She upset me very unwell partner 3 days ago and its been brewing since then. She is the first to lose her shit when someone makes a mess in the bathroom but just drops all her plates and cooking gear in the sink even when the dishwasher is open and empty.  Yes I said dishwasher, WTF is her malfunction.  She tells one person one thing and then another the opposite.  She bitches about parking under the cover then parks on the streets for days.  She is a mental case and I will not have this BS in my house. My partner wont say anything but is backing everything.  The little princess is going to be told the main bathroom isn't her's to do as she pleases its a common area in the house she has to look after.  As for stealing my food.  I am over it, I don't have spare $$$$$ to feed her

Now EF no bad comments...

Hey all.  Hey EF I know your probably grinning right now, but I have to say my car is still broken :( Bloody Renault.  I picked you out EF because I had no sympathy when you were going through car troubles recently, and well that bloody guy murphy doubled with Karma has bit me in the arse. To the tech heads out there, I have replaced, the alternator, the fuel pump has been tested, crank angle sensor replaced (Huge Job, 6.5 hours eek) We have checked oil pressure and replaced oil and filter, and cleaned the cam shaft dephaser solenoid.  And we are out of things to fix.  Well not quite.  There is a theory amoungst those trying to fix this car that the actual cam dephaser pulley is failing. This is a very expensive thing to get fixed.  Its around $450 for the pulley and then around another $500 for labor. So I am getting the car taken to a Euro specialist in town here let him look at the car and work out whats wrong just in case its something else simple that we cannot work out at the

Three little words

Was watching the TV just now and three little words had me crying like a baby. Thats my Son. Its what dad said the day I surprised him on Holidays, he was crying he was so happy to see me.   Great memory, and a moment to live for

Mental Health Update...

Howdy guys I know its been a few days, but things are settling down now.  Looks like I have a drug which can effectively help me without having to take copious amounts.  I know it will take some fine tuning from here on in, and im sure my doses will be adopted to how my mental health picture presents over time. Traditionally Christmas is a hard time for me, maybe this year will be different since I wont be trying to shift house.  I hope the medication changes we have implemented this year will also make a difference to how I cope over the Christmas period.  I know I would like to get to Mission Beach so I can go talk to dad and wish him a merry Christmas and of course share a port with him, like we did every year since I was 7.

Hate and what we teach the young.

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Yeah yeah I can hear you all sighing now.  I have spoken about Hate before and how its not acceptable to teach it to our young.  Yet I am sure there is not one of you out there, that in some form or another teach hate to others around you.  Yes that is a big call from me but please let me explain. Hate in itself is insidious, it reaches into every part of our lives, every day we repeat or see something that is hateful.  Not intentionally, in fact quite often its not intentional and the people sprouting the hate don't understand that they are in fact doing harm.  I'm guilty of it, I have often said things about different people races, creeds etc that are generalizations that are hateful in intent.  I caught myself today calling a Muslim woman a terrorist when she walked out in front of me while I was driving.  Not a nice thing to say, what made it worse was the three children she had with her. I sprouted the hatred that has grown in me since 9/11.  That date in itself was

Time after Time.

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Another timeless classic for you all.  I remember a time when Cyndi & Madonna were all over the charts, where clothes were mad and hair styles to match.   I find the lyrics to this song amazing  My favorite verse is this  After my picture fades and darkness Has turned to gray Watching through windows You're wondering if I'm okay Secrets stolen from deep inside The drum beats out of time If you're lost you can look and you will find me Time after time If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting Time after time A real song writer in the 1980's who would have thought it, remember pop had no meaning right ? Lyrics below Lyin' in my bed I hear the clock tick And think of you Caught up in circles confusion Is nothing new Flashback warm nights Almost left behind Suitcase of memories Time after Sometimes you picture me I'm walking too far ahead You're calling to me I can't hear

Hello from inside the hole

Hey, just wanted to let you know how I am going with the medication change.  It wasnt as bad as the worst case scenario but, has been pretty debilitating. Was a lot better today than i have been most the week. Think this med is a keeper, in my good moments my mind is a lot clearer, so only time will tell. Thanks for thinking of me

The eve of change

Well today is a day that I have both dreaded and wished for.  Contradiction no.  I have wished for better medication, but dread what it means.  You see I made a promise to myself a long time ago, that I would do everything in my power to get better, to become some kind of "normal".  I hate that word, because no one is normal, yet it fits what I am trying to say. Part of this journey I have undertaken is a constant change of medications.  Its been a hard road many days to sick to even be awake. But my life and my ability to live have benefited greatly for it.  Yes there have been some steps back, but that is to be expected. Not every drug is going to work for me, such is the state of psychiatric drug therapy. So tonight I stand on the precipice again. I am willing taking a risk with my life, I am going to make myself unwell in the hope that a new medication will make my life better again.  Its a hard choice, at my doctors today we went over every possible reaction I could

Winston

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Winston Churchill is a controversial man, one who made serious mistakes in his life that cost young men and boys their lives.  But he is also considered the only man for the job during the second world war.  From his heroic savior of the British Expeditionary Forces at Dunkirk to his rousing speeches in the house of commons, he can be and is seen as an extraordinary person a man made for the moment. His personal and often painful speeches to the population of England during the second world war showed his innate ability to rouse a population and to put into words what many were feeling.  To me he is a hero of the highest order, he not only fought the NAZI's but also his own personal battle with depression.  His forward vision saw the carving up of Europe to east and west long before his speech in the UN about the Iron curtain. He did everything he could to warn us but by then the world was deaf to his calls. I come across his speeches from time to time, this one I came across

Castle of Glass

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Hi; Saw this music video for the first time just now.  Yes its another LP video, but I think its amazing, and definately worth the watch.  I don't think there is another artist in the world today that could do that topic the justice that it deserves. LP at their best, im blown away Lyrics Below; Take me down to the river bend Take me down to the fighting end Wash the poison from off my skin Show me how to be whole again Fly me up on a silver wing Past the black where the sirens sing Warm me up in a nova's glow And drop me down to the dream below 'Cause I'm only a crack in this castle of glass Hardly anything left for you to see For you to see Bring me home in a blinding dream, Through the secrets that I have seen Wash the sorrow from off my skin And show me how to be whole again 'Cause I'm only a crack in this castle of glass Hardly anything left for you to see For you to see 'Cause I'm only a crack in this castle of

Sensor Sensor where are thou ?

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Hi all; Well we took a very large step forward today in getting this car back onto the road and operational.  We had friends over last night and Ben works for a company that deals with car electrics and fuel.  We got talking about the issues I have been having and offered to run my ECU over the latest computer diagnostic machines to see if we could get any closer to a solution. So headed over there this afternoon, plugged in the computer set it up, and presto straight away 3 errors recorded on system.  Now I know that sounds bad, but in this case it was good.  Seems Greg diag computer could not read my system. We have a fault at the crank angle sensor and the Camshaft Dephaser.  Ben called the guys who knew what this meant and we have two possible answers. (1) The oil in the car is incorrect. When the service was done in Sydney the guy could have used the wrong oil.  This will cause the dephaser to not work correctly when adjusting the VVT cam timing. It could also be throwin

This is a greater saga than days of our lives.

An update of sorts.  As you all know there have been issues with the car of late, and that we have been replacing some very expensive bits trying to get it sorted. Well Friday lunch time took the poorly running car over to the mechanics to replace the Alternator that I ordered brand new from the UK the week before.  He tells me before I get there that I should be able to do the work on my own..  Turns out there isn't a chance in hell I could have lol.  We had some major drama's getting it fitted, but its in and has cleared one set of faults.  We also fitted the washer motor that hasn't worked since I got the car. It wasn't a total loss the alternator was bad and causing issues, but its not the reason for the stalling and poor running.  We now heavily suspect that it will be the fuel pump.  We would have checked the fuel pressure on Friday had the apprentice not destroyed the tester a couple weeks ago. So going in on Monday to see if that is an issue.  If it is shoul

And a Step to the Left. Iran v's world

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Hi all.  Normally on this blog I try to keep away from current affairs, I may delve from time to time into issues of personal importance to me, but I try to keep it refrained. However today I am going to step out of that realm to set some so called experts right.  I will be talking directly about the up coming engagement between Iran and the rest of the known world, over its badly hidden nuclear weapons program. First things first.  There is no love lost between Iran and Israel, Iran has repeatedly stated that it will burn the state of Israel from the map.  It has incited violence and sponsored terror throughout the middle east and the world.  It claims to be a peaceful loving country, yet its actions show it to be anything but.   The US and Iran are also long standing enemy's, with the US having sponsored a war between Iran and Iraq with bad consequences as history has shown. But there is more to this future conflict than meets the eye.  Firstly none of Iran's neighb

The Garden

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Hey all.  Unlike most people the winter in the tropics is the best time of the year, the humidity is low and the temperature is nice and warm.  However it does present its challenges.  Once we are in the winter or dry cycle we may go three or four months with no rain at all.  This means the poor garden gets a bit of a hammering, as does the lawn. We started watering in earnest about 3 weeks ago, and the garden is flowering which is awesome, please don't ask me what each flower is as I have no idea, I just know they look fantastic and I thought I should share them with you all. I love this time of year, its a bit like the calm before the storm, as we move towards the heat of December and the wet by January.   It was one of the hardest things I had to come to terms with when I moved here was how hot and wet the summer months are, but hey we have the best winters on earth, and I challenge anyone to come live here and say otherwise.  Wont be long will have tons of green tree frogs

Enlighten me

Well itst that crazy time of the year again here, both the major footy codes had their grandfinal this last weekend.  Crazy one eyed supporters everywhere. You see although I have a favorite team in both codes, I really have no real value in watching them play.  But it has not always been this way.  There have been years where I havent missed a game in either code, where I have screamed yelled, abused the ref and so on.  But these last years since the illness, I find it irritating and not entertaining.  Alas I feel kind of what Caligula did before he went on his rampage lol. Now that was a joke example, but a general felling of I have seen it all before courses through my veins.  Now im sure ed will call me all names after that admission, and I probably deserve it..   About the only sport I can watch right now is WRC...